Childbirth Class and Preparation!

Lloyd and I attended a one day (8 hour) childbirth class offered through Kaiser on October 18th.  The class was $100 but well worth every single penny!  Even though it was only one day (versus the 5 week, 2 1/2 hour per session course) we walked away feeling like we had all the information we needed to be prepared for labor.

When we first found out we were pregnant I had no grand intentions of trying to go through labor without any form of pain management.  I had already experienced a small glimpse of what labor feels like when I had my second miscarriage and I was well aware that it's extremely painful.  However, sometime over these past few months I have really embraced the idea of a completely natural labor (although I am open to being flexible with my birth plan and getting an epidural if needed).  Lloyd's okay with whatever I decide but he was also encouraged by some co-workers that raved about their natural childbirth experience and just knowing that it is possible to do labor without assistance (his mother and grandmother both used pain management of some sorts- epidural and drugs).

My mom has been a great help in encouraging me.  She delivered both myself and my brother completely naturally and reminds me all the time that I can do this (actually both her and my dad remind me that I've completed 3 Ironmans and 7 marathons, surely I have the mental strength to get through the pain that accompanies labor).  Although she is encouraging she has also reminded me that this is my labor and I need to do what is best for me and Cameron and that I don't need to go through with a natural labor just to please someone else- if I do it, it will be for me and me only.

Anyways, back to class!  The doula teaching the class was amazing!  In fact, I would love to hire her but am not sure how necessary that is.  I'm confident that Lloyd will do a great job coaching me through all the contractions and hope that we successfully deliver Cameron naturally.  She gave us some great tips: 

• labor at home as much as possible (she advised us to leave for the hospital when my contractions are 3 minutes apart, 60 seconds long, and for 1 hour)
• we do not want an episiotomy unless medically necessary
• we want intermittent monitoring
• we want to move around as much as possible
• we want to use the bath/shower
• we don't want the umbilical chord cut until it stops pulsating
• we want skin-to-skin immediately if possible, etc.
• Lloyd will stay with Cameron if they take him to the nursery and remind the nurses that they need to get him back to me as soon as possible

We left feeling very empowered and invigorated!  Oh, and we had originally planned to deliver at Kaiser in Fontana but, after taking the doula's advice (which was strongly against Fontana for a natural delivery), have decided to deliver Cameron in Riverside! 

Now that class is done and we have our birth plan in place, I am starting to mentally prepare and visualize how that day might look and unfold.  To do so I bought a book called Ina May's Guide to Childbirth: Updated With New Material.  I just started reading it and am finding it very empowering as well!  Part I tells the birth stories of numerous women who delivered naturally (and most at The Farm or in a home setting).  The book shows that labor is a very natural experience that women were designed to do instead of all the horror stories that we hear of today and the fear of pain, you can't do it mentality, etc that our culture has come to embrace.  I'm very much looking forward to learning more and more as I journey through this book.

I cannot believe that it's already November, which means next month we will be meeting our precious little Cameron!  As each day passes and we get closer to his arrival, I find myself so enthused with excitement!  I absolutely cannot wait for Cameron to be her, to hold him in my arms for the first time, to see what he looks like, and to just love every second of being his mommy!  Life is so incredibly good!

Baby Shower!

We had our baby shower on October 4th!  It was absolutely perfect- the food was great and Cameron is so loved and spoiled but most importantly it meant the world to have everyone there celebrating in the arrival of our son!  We are truly blessed beyond words!  Oh, and it was a nautical theme- just like Cameron's room!

Shower hosts, Linda and Terri!  Thank you ladies!

Me, Dad, and Linda!

Mom and Aunt Annette writing on Cameron's life-saver!

Diaper cake from Karina!

Me, Aunt Annette, Mom, Glenna, Grandma Mary, and Diana!

Shower games- Baby Word Search and Baby Bingo!

Carolyin Joy checking things out!

Love Cameron's name for his nursery- perfect for above his crib!

Life-saver for Cameron's room!  Everyone wrote him a little message :)

 

Homemade blanket from my Aunt Annette!

My diaper bag!  My Mom stuffed every pocket with all kinds of goodies- Butt paste, shampoo, pacifiers, clothes, diaper clutch, and much more!  Super creative and thoughtful!

Hand-made nautical quilt from Mom Williams!

Cameron's little walker!  Before we know it he'll be roaming around the house!

Cameron's whale bath tub filled with all the bath time essentials!  Thank you Grandma Mary- cannot wait to give our little guy many baths...many fun memories to be created!

This little girl has my heart!  Love you Carolyn Joy!  She also tested all baby toys and gave her two thumbs up approval! :)

My amazing sister-in-law, Diana, made these adorable sailboats!
 

Our little guy is all set!  Cannot believe he's going to be here in about 2 more months!  Now it's time to organize his nursery and enjoy these next few weeks before his arrival!  Both Lloyd and I are feeling overwhelmed with thankfulness and gratitude as we have nearly all that we need prior to his birth day!

28 and 29 Weeks: 3rd Trimester is Here!!

Baby Bump- 29 weeks!

That's right- as of last week, I am officially in my 3rd trimester!! 

Today, I am 29w2d pregnant and overall feeling pretty good!  My biggest complaint right now is that my hips hurt really bad at night while sleeping and I inevitably wake up in so much pain that I have to switch to sleeping reclined in our bed. 

Other than that, I love being pregnant (feeling little Cameron kick is the absolute best!) and am thankful that I am still walking every day (sometimes up to 2 hours total, between a walk in the morning and in the evening)!

Our campsite!

Not too much has been going on pregnancy-wise.  This past weekend Lloyd and I took advantage of having a weekend of no plans and went camping!  We decided to check out a new campsite up in Idyllwild (Boulder Basin).  We headed up there early on Friday, arriving around noon.  We had reserved site 23 but quickly decided that we liked site 27 better, so we made the switch since it was available.

Unfortunately, it was not the ideal weekend to go camping.  It was cold and windy on Friday.  After setting up camp we took a walk around the campground to explore.  We spontaneously decided that we wanted to walk up to the lookout tower (it's a tower that has volunteers running it daily to check for wildfires in the area).  The sign said it was only 1/4 mile so we thought we would go up there and check it out (it was probably closer to 1/2 mile each way and a very steep uphill getting there...starting elevation was 7,300 ft; ending elevation was 7,700+ ft).

29 weeks pregnant and at 7,772 ft elevation!

Once at the tower we met the volunteers.  To our surprise it was a retired married couple from Yorba Linda (we could literally throw a rock from our old condo and hit their house!).  We enjoyed talking to them and learning all about the fire tower and volunteer opportunity...in fact, we took a card to explore more into this option (something that Lloyd and I can do a few years down the road!)!

Back at camp we made dinner (turkey burgers and baked beans), had a camp fire (and ate s'mores), and called it a night around 9 pm.  That night was rough (even sleeping on an air mattress!).  It was cold and windy all night and neither of us got a great night of sleep. 

View from Fire Tower Lookout hike (on the way up)

We did end up sleeping, off and on, until about 7:30 am.  Once up, Lloyd got the fire started.  We enjoyed it for a little while until being frustrated at the variable wind direction and smoke blowing in every direction.  After the fire we took a walk down to get water (0.9 mile each way).  On the way back we had a nice conversation with the camp ranger and our next door neighbors (nice couple from Beaumont).

Back to our site we made breakfast...breakfast burritos- yum!!  We relaxed for quite some time and then decided to hike to the group camp, about 1.5 miles down the road.  On the way to our destination we saw some Yellow Post sites...we'll have to check those out next year!  The group camp was very secluded and peaceful!  The hike was beautiful and it was great to get out and away from camp (and get some exercise too!)!

View of Morongo Casino and valley from Fire Lookout Tower

After our trek, we arrived back to a cold and windy campsite.  We were both wondering what to do (whether to stay or go home) as the weather was only getting worse.  Ultimately, we decided to pack most things up, make dinner, enjoy the camp fire, and head home around 9 pm.  It just wasn't worth another night of being cold and not sleeping well. 

So, that's exactly what we did.  We made burritos (chicken, black beans, corn, and cheese on a whole wheat flour tortilla) for dinner, enjoyed the camp fire, ate some s'mores, and called it good.  We left around 8:30 pm and started the drive home.  Thankfully we did as it rained on the way home and the next morning the weather was showing 29 degrees in the mountains (and looked very ominous!).

Besides our camping adventure, this week is really exciting as I have our baby shower this Saturday!!  I'm so excited to see everyone (some friends and family will be there that I haven't seen in a long time) and to see all the great things that we will get for little Cameron!  We are truly so blessed to have everyone in our life and so excited for this little guy's arrival!!!

27 Weeks: OC 1/2 Marathon, Baby Shower (cousin's), and Nursery Furniture!

27w2d pregnant!!  This past week was filled with so much busyness and goodness!

First, I signed up for the OC 1/2 Marathon!  The race is May 3, 2015...so, Cameron will just under 5 months old (or so, depending on when he decides to arrive).  I will have about 4 months to train after 9 months of no running!  I am so excited for having this to look forward to!  Both my dad and I will be running together (something I absolutely love and cherish) and it's the race where I qualified for Boston and ran my fastest marathon in 2012, just a couple months before we started our TTC journey!  It will be great to be back at that race!

Second, my cousin had her baby shower this weekend.  Lloyd's best friend Andy (and his wife Jen, live close to the shower, so I asked to stop by for a visit and drop off a meal for them since they just had their precious Jacob 6 weeks ago.  It was great seeing Andy and Jacob...he was sleeping when I got there but Andy woke him up (isn't there a rule against that...never wake a sleeping baby!?!?) so that I could hold him and visit with him.  Luckily, he wasn't too upset by this and actually fell back to sleep in my arms!  He is so cute and I really enjoyed spending time with him- he's growing so fast!

Anyways, back to my cousin...she is due October 19th and it was great to see her and the rest of our family!  The host, Carrie, read from Psalm 139 prior to everyone getting their food.  I love this part of scripture and it was such a beautiful reminder of just how intricately involved God is in the details of Cameron and the purpose for our precious son's life.

You have searched me, Lord,
and you know me.
² You know when I sit and when I rise;
you perceive my thoughts from afar.
³ You discern my going out and my lying down;
you are familiar with all my ways.
⁴ Before a word is on my tongue
you, Lord, know it completely.
⁵ You hem me in behind and before,
and you lay your hand upon me.
⁶ Such knowledge is too wonderful for me,
too lofty for me to attain.

⁷ Where can I go from your Spirit?
Where can I flee from your presence?
⁸ If I go up to the heavens, you are there;
if I make my bed in the depths, you are there.
⁹ If I rise on the wings of the dawn,
if I settle on the far side of the sea,
¹⁰ even there your hand will guide me,
your right hand will hold me fast.
¹¹ If I say, “Surely the darkness will hide me
and the light become night around me,”
¹² even the darkness will not be dark to you;
the night will shine like the day,
for darkness is as light to you.

¹³ For you created my inmost being;
you knit me together in my mother’s womb.
¹⁴ I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made;
your works are wonderful,
I know that full well.
¹⁵ My frame was not hidden from you
when I was made in the secret place,
when I was woven together in the depths of the earth.
¹⁶ Your eyes saw my unformed body;
all the days ordained for me were written in your book
before one of them came to be.
¹⁷ How precious to me are your thoughts,^[a] God!
How vast is the sum of them!
¹⁸ Were I to count them,
they would outnumber the grains of sand—
when I awake, I am still with you.

¹⁹ If only you, God, would slay the wicked!
Away from me, you who are bloodthirsty!
²⁰ They speak of you with evil intent;
your adversaries misuse your name.
²¹ Do I not hate those who hate you, Lord,
and abhor those who are in rebellion against you?
²² I have nothing but hatred for them;
I count them my enemies.
²³ Search me, God, and know my heart;
test me and know my anxious thoughts.
²⁴ See if there is any offensive way in me,
and lead me in the way everlasting.

 

 

After the shower, Linda, Diana, and I drove to Laguna Hills to meet my brother and dad at Starbucks.  Unfortunately, Starbucks didn't have enough indoor seating (and it was HOT outside, slightly over 100 degrees!).  So, we decided to walk across the street to BJ's Restaurant.  Dad, Kenny, and Diana all enjoyed a nice cold beer while Linda had water (she's doing a detox diet) and I had strawberry lemonade (it was deliciously refreshing!).  We visited for just an over an hour before I had to leave to make the drive home.

 

I just have to say that my husband, Lloyd, is absolutely amazing!  I am the luckiest woman in the world to have such an amazing husband, lover, best friend, co-pilot, and father for my children!  While I was away at the baby shower, Lloyd started painting the wainscoting in the nursery.  We both thought it would take both Saturday and Sunday to finish but he was able to finish it in about 6 hours on Saturday!  I came home to not only having the nursery painted but also the dresser all set up in the nursery!  And, to top it off, we worked for about 5 hours on Sunday putting the crib together, deciding on furniture setup (we didn't realize how small his room was until we tried putting a dresser, crib, and rocking chair in there!), cleaning the room out and organizing the guest room!  We made such great progress this weekend and it's a HUGE relief!  It feels great to have this checked off our To-Do list...now we just need to get the rest of Cameron's stuff, finish decorating the nursery, make some meals to freeze, and attend some classes!  We are getting closer and closer to being ready for our little guy's arrival!

 

Finally, we made it to church yesterday!  We have been so busy and out of town most weekends that it's been awhile since we've gone.  It felt so great being back in church, surrounded by many people we haven't seen in awhile, worship, and a great message on the vision of our church.  I'm so glad we decided to go (we ended up at the 5 pm service...better late than never!)!  I hope that we can get back into the routine of going on a regular basis and get connected more!  Speaking of, our small group starts on Thursday and that's very exciting as the group is for expecting parents and/or new parents!

 

Pregnancy-wise, things are going really well!  I am feeling great (for the most part) and loving being pregnant!  I have another doctor's appointment tomorrow morning and am excited to see my OB and hopefully see little Cameron (I will at minimum get to hear his heartbeat via Doppler)!  I also have to do my glucose test for gestational diabetes...not looking forward to this but hoping that I pass and that I don't have GD or have to do the 3-hour test!

 

God is so good!  This past week was filled with so many blessings!  Life is so good and I am enjoying every minute!  Cameron is very active these days and it's such a relief and blessing!  In fact, he loves to kick sometime around 2-3 am and I find that I really look forward to those moments (I am usually awake and switching sleeping positions thanks to my nightly hip pain)!  It's amazing to think that he will be here in 12 weeks or so...we officially have less than 3 months til his EDD!!! 



26 Weeks: Jesus Calling- September 9, 2014

Today I am 26w3d pregnant!  Little Cameron is kicking a lot these days (especially at 2 am) and it's absolutely the best feeling ever!  I am so bonded and in love with our little guy!  I cannot believe he's going to be in here about 3 more months!  So excited to meet him and hold him in my arms for the first time!

Nothing too exciting pregnancy-wise this week.  Next week I need to complete the Glucose Test to determine if I have Gestational Diabetes (it's a routine test done between 26-28 weeks).  So long as my numbers come back okay from the 1 hour test, then I am good to go; otherwise, I will have to do the 3 hour test.  I also have another appointment next week and am hoping to have an ultrasound (not sure if she will do one but one can hope!).  It would be great to see the little guy!!

Yesterday, as I was reading one of my online forum boards, I learned that someone's cousin just delivered her baby still born at 38 weeks.  The tears and pain that I felt when reading the news is indescribable.  I can only imagine the pain that mother is feeling right now.  It brought back all those feelings and pain from our two losses and reminded me not to take a minute for granted with our little guy.

Thankfully, I am truly loving every moment of being pregnant!  This is somewhat weird to me because I can remember saying all too frequently that I didn't really care about going through the whole pregnancy thing, I just wanted a baby.  This was before and when we had just started trying to get pregnant.  I know that this is just one of the ways God used our journey to change me.  Honestly, some days I love the fact that I get little Cameron all to myself and that we have this special bond and I know that I will miss his little kicks once this pregnancy is over.

Today, as I was reading Jesus Calling it was a great reminder that God's got His hand all over this pregnancy and our journey.  I was reminded of the verse that I dedicate to this journey and now hold as my life verse (Proverbs 3:5-6):

WALK WITH ME along paths of trust.  The most direct route between point A and point B on your life-journey is the path of unwavering trust in Me.  When your faith falters, you choose a trail that meanders and takes you well out of your way.  You will get to point B eventually, but you will have lost precious time and energy.  As soon as you realize you have wandered from your trust-path, look to Me and whisper, "I trust you, Jesus".  This affirmation will help you get back on track.

 

The farther you roam along paths of unbelief, the harder it is to remember that I am with you.  Anxious thoughts branch off in all directions, taking you farther and farther from awareness of My Presence.  You need to voice your trust in Me frequently.  This simple act of faith will keep you walking along straight paths with Me.  Trust in Me with all your heart, and I will make your paths straight.

 

GOD IS GOOD AND HE IS FAITHFUL!  As I was driving to work this morning and reflecting on the message in Jesus Calling, I was reminded of how much of this journey has been a spiritual journey and season of growth for me personally.  God brought me to a place where my only choice was to kneel on my knees and look up, leaning on Him for strength, accepting His peace, and holding on to the hope that can only be found in Him.  It was the furthest possible from an easy season of my life but it was a journey and a reward that I would choose to do all over again knowing what I know now. 

 

Thank you God for carrying me through such a hard time and holding true to the promises that you kept assuring me of every step of the way!  I'm forever humbled and thankful- I could never deserve the love you have shown to me.



Jesus Calling- September 1, 2014

Yesterday's Jesus Calling was perfect!  It speaks to exactly how I have been feeling lately and caused me to reflect on our journey to where we are today.

SEEK ME with your whole being.  I desire to be found by you, and I orchestrate the events of your life with that purpose in mind.  When things go well and you are blessed, you can feel Me smiling on you.  When you encounter rough patches along your life-journey, trust that My Light is still shining upon you.  My reasons for allowing these adversities may be shrouded in mystery, but My continual Presence with you is an absolute promise.  Seek Me in good times; seek Me in hard times.  You will find Me watching over you all the time.

 

God IS smiling down on Lloyd and I right now!  He's beaming from ear to ear and saying to me, "Look, I promised that good times were ahead.  You just had to trust Me, hold on to hope, have faith in Me, and be patient". 

 

One thing I know to be true after going through all we did when we lost our two babies is that God NEVER left my side.  In fact, without God, I don't know how I would have survived the darkest of times.  He was there for me when I felt completely alone and He carried me when the pain was too much to bear.  All along the way He kept promising me that, no matter what was in front of me or around the corner, that I was going to be okay and that better days were ahead.  He took me to a place where I had no other choice but to lean on Him and to trust in Him...and in that season I experienced my greatest pain but also my greatest growth.  I am forever thankful for the journey He took us on because it's changed me forever...I have a hope and a faith that is stronger than ever and I have a relationship with God that is much more meaningful and intimate because of the path He took us on. 

 

Thank you God for your relentless love, your peace that surpasses all understanding, your friendship, grace, and strength!  You are good and You ARE faithful!

Weeks 24 and 25!

Me at 25w1d pregnant!

Today I am 25w3d pregnant! 

Week 24 marks a huge milestone- Cameron is a viable baby, meaning that if he was born anytime after 24 weeks he could survive (although this early would likely mean lots of complications and time in NICU so we are hoping and praying that he stays put for many more weeks).

The last couple of weeks have been very busy.  We had a 1st birthday party for my friend's daughter, Carolyn Joy.  Carolyn has been such a blessing to me!  She was born about 7 weeks before Joy was due.  Ever since she was one week old I have been able to spend time with her each week and watch her grow this past year.  Every minute with her is a blessing and there were many times where she kept me going after our second loss.  Today, hanging out with her is a reminder of all that we have to look forward to with Cameron!  Lloyd finally met her at the party and she immediately captured his heart- watching the two of them together melted my heart too!

Last Thursday I had my most recent doctor's appointment.  After waiting 2 hours, I finally got in to see my doctor (thankfully she is well worth the wait!).  She asked how everything was going and I gave her the update.  I asked my questions about road trips, camping at 29 weeks pregnant (and 7300 ft elevation), told her about my Braxton Hicks contractions, talked about birth control and how breastfeeding might be affected if we try for #2 when Cameron is 6 months old, and we talked about the infamous glucose tolerance test (which tests for gestational diabetes and should be done around 26-28 weeks).  She measured my bump and we listened to Cameron's heartbeat on the Doppler, both were great indicators that he's continuing to be our little champ (heartbeat was around 150)!!  Oh, and she sent me home withe the 3rd trimester packet filled with lots of information (talk about overwhelming)- breastfeeding for success, birth plan preference, birth control, classes, maternity leave, breast pumps, newborn screening tests, etc.

Friday morning I went with Lloyd to work and visited with my friend Whitney, Jan, JD, and little Jackson (Whitney's mom, husband, and 4 month old son, respectively).  It was so wonderful to spend the day with them and see little Jackson!  I cannot believe how fast he is growing- seems like he was just born yesterday!

Dad, Linda, Lloyd, and I at the ranch!

Lloyd got off around 1:30 p.m. and we tried our best to beat traffic on our way to my uncle's ranch in Santa Ynez (we did not succeed- traffic was horrendous).  On the way, we made a fast stop at Costco to pick up some wine, chips, salsa, and hummus for the weekend.  While there we saw that the dresser that matches our crib was reduced to 1/2 price ($200 vs $400).  I asked about the warehouse inventory and price near our home and found that we could get it in Moreno Valley for the same price (other warehouses had it for $300).  Anyways, we finally made it to Santa Ynez and enjoyed a nice dinner out with my uncle, his fiance, and my dad and step mom! 

Uncle John, Ariane, Lloyd, and I

Saturday morning we woke up and went to the horse training track (my uncle breed's thoroughbred race horses) to watch two of his horses learn to ride with a jockey on their back.  It was very interesting to see them do this!  Afterwards we went to a golf country club to have blueberry pancakes for breakfast but unfortunately could not stay as power was off and they were unable to cook anything.  Little did we know that this was going to be quite the problem and adventure in search for food!  Around 11:00 am we ended up at a little grocery store that serves breakfast and lunch and enjoyed some sandwiches and coffee.  Afterwards we enjoyed some shopping in downtown Solvang and the Figueroa Brewery before heading back to the ranch, where we rested for a couple of hours before heading out to dinner.

Sunday morning we woke up, packed up our stuff, took some pictures, and headed back to the country club for the blueberry pancakes.  They were all they were cracked up to be- very delicious with lots of blueberries!  Once breakfast was over we all went our separate ways and Lloyd and I made our way back home (this time traffic was much better!). 

Lloyd and I <3

On the drive home we decided that we should get the dresser today instead of Wednesday (I was going to stop on my way home from work on Weds).  I was worried that it might not be available by then and/or fit in my car.  My step dad had called and asked about our registry and what I wanted while we were deciding all this.  I let him know that I might need his help (he has a truck) and gave him the options (after he gave me his budget) of the baby monitor, crib bedding, or dresser and he generously decided to give us a check for the dresser.  He came over, picked me up, and we ventured to Costco to pick up the dresser- thankfully we did because there is no way I could have done that by myself without having to ask for lots of help (it's pretty big, super heavy, and might not have fit in my car).

So, today we have about 15 more weeks until our little guy is here!  Life is so good and we are incredibly blessed!  I am loving every minute of being pregnant and am already so in love with little Cameron!  He's kicking quite a bit these days and those are the moments that I just love...the rest of life just seems to fade in those moments and he has my full attention!  It's amazing to be where we are today- it's a feeling that has me completely humbled and thankful!  God is so good and I cannot thank Him enough for all the ways He continues to bless our life!