God Doesn't Give Us More Than We Can Handle

After confirming that we had lost our baby, I called Lloyd to let him know the horrible news.  He was at work and this was the last thing he was expecting to hear.  He told me that he would let his manager know and that he was coming home.  I reassured him that I was okay (I was still in shock and disbelief) but he insisted and came home.

As we sat around our home, not sure what to do or say, we found ourselves on our front porch.  We were asking the questions "Why?", "What do we do now?", and "Who do we still need to tell?".  I was angry and felt like it was cruel that I had to continue going on with life knowing that my lifeless baby was still in my womb.  It was on this front porch and during this conversation that Lloyd reminded me that "God doesn't give us more than we can handle".

I sarcastically responded, "Well, I think God is overestimating my strength on this one".  But, it's true...WITH God, we can get through anything!  As I look back on the past 7 months, I have gone from a place of fear, restlessness, anxiety, sadness, and anger to a place where I can honestly say that no matter what God's answer is each and every month, it's a good answer!  I want God's plan because it is immeasurably greater than anything I can ever plan for myself!

My prayer the past couple months has been for God to continue providing me with His peace and comfort as I wait on Him to fulfill His plan for this journey.  The funny thing is that if God were to tell me today, "I promise you will have your baby in your arms but it's going to be two years from now", I honestly would be okay!  Although I am very confident that God will answer this prayer, it's the waiting for His perfect timing and not knowing "when" that is hard.

That's why He asks us to trust in Him always and to focus on His promises...God is always victorious and comes through ON time EVERY time! :)  Each month that passes and we get another "Not Yet" answer, Lloyd and I remind each other that God just has an extra special baby up there for us!  With each passing day the desire to be a parent continues to deepen and we know that we are forever changed for the better having gone through this journey!

Only time will tell what this journey unfolds...but today, and always, I believe that God is good and He will provide the strength to get us through each and every day!